. . . AND SOME I DON'T

This list could contain so many things: call centres, acronymic number plates, banks, Health & Safety, politicians and government (especially local government which is too often a money wasting superfluity designed increasingly to do little more than enhance unemployment statistics), political correctness and most television programmes would be a useful start. But these are universal. They annoy almost all of us. The following few are my particular bête noires.

Rococo

My ideal interior design is ascetic and falls somewhere between English monastic and genuine Shaker. Enough said, really. I cannot, though, deny the attraction of Fragonard’s ‘The Swing’ or Boucher’s portrait of Marie-Louise O’Murphy.

The legacy of Harley Earl

Earl, the head of styling at General Motors for thirty years from 1927 was, of course, not all bad. Anyone who, in the aftermath of Enola Gay, has the temerity to design a car that looks like an aeroplane must deserve some sort of accolade. What upsets me about him is his advocacy of the ‘dynamic economy’, the principle which made over-consumption and wastefulness not only an essential element of western economics but made it socially acceptable too.

Spot welding

It’s robotic, unreliable, never seamless and I don’t agree in principle with joining two components in such a way that they cannot normally be un-joined. Traditional welding properly done unites two components into one. A spot welded joint always remains as two pieces clumsily joined. It is the conjoined twin of engineering.

Information

(In the context of information technology). I would like to see an international law compelling all search engines to carry below (or preferably above) their logos the following statements: Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom.

The liveries of most British buses and trains

We could learn a lot from eastern European operators, and we should, before they are unwise enough to learn from us. If this happens, as it probably will, we can look back to the years between the first and second world wars for inspiration.  In 1947 Attlee’s government perhaps had no choice but to nationalise the railways. The trains were worn out but at least they were properly painted.

Leisure and tourism

This has nearly nothing to do with travel. It has to do with being lazy, taking photographs of things instead of looking at them, wearing appalling clothes, being noisy and filling the once perfect sky with foul fumes. But most of all it has to do with allowing ourselves to become the gullible puppets of just another industry.

Logistics and solutions

In 2007 a letter in a national newspaper suggested that a fuel tax reduction should be given to any road transport company who did not use the words 'logistics' or 'solutions' on their vehicles. I doubt that any politician would have the wit or intellect to understand the sense of this but the writer should have been given an award for the suggestion. In my field I instinctively steer clear of printers who offer me 'print solutions'. It's a case of contagious pretentiousness and will very likely spread to the health service: 'Visit your local health solutions centre.' I would rather die.